Friday, September 09, 2005

Thank you! I'll be here all this week!

Babble on.

Having the Canadian blogosphere rely on Babbling Brooks for humourous content would be like having residents of New Orleans rely on any level of government for competent help in a hurricane. Badoom boomp. Wocka wocka wocka.


Yes...well then...For significantly less lameness in your diet of politically-minded yuks, I'd suggest Gnotalex instead:

Natural disasters do not strike Canada, because Canadians are universally loved, especially by Mommy Earth. But should she (or more likely the Portland Hills Fault) slip up and accidentally level Vancouver with a 9+ Richter quake, our worries will be few, because our Government has been extensively preparing for this for years.

Unbeknownst to most Canadians, the authorities have been busy building an exact copy of Vancouver, complete with cars, house furnishings and heroin addicts, deep in the interior of B.C. And here's the genius part: the whole thing is mounted on millions of caster wheels, like on a dessert-cart.

Need I tell you to read the rest? Much as I'd love to steal his punchline, I'm afraid I wouldn't last long after incurring the wrath of the sharp-tongued blog québécois.

I will steal his idea though: I think I'll set up a kickback scheme to fund my opulent waterfront villa disaster replacement shelter. Forced donations to this project - in the form of excessive taxes, of course - are welcome.

Babble off.


At 10:46 p.m., Blogger Pat Patterson said...

Are you sure that the new Vancouver is true to scale not like the 18" Stonehenge in 'This Is Spinal Tap', that was supposed to be 18'?

At 9:26 a.m., Blogger Doug said...

David Warren had wrote might be a worthwhile companion article.

There's plenty wrong with America, since you asked. (Everybody's asking.) I'm tempted to say, the only difference from Canada, is that they have a few things right. That would be unfair, of course -- I am often pleased to discover things we still get right.

But one of them would not be disaster preparation. If something happened up here, on the scale of Katrina, we wouldn't even have the resources to arrive late. We would be waiting for the Americans to come save us, the same way the government in Louisiana just waved and pointed at Washington, D.C. The theory being, that when you're in real trouble, that's where the adults live.

At 9:26 a.m., Blogger Doug said...

"Had wrote"? Mine English are good.

At 2:18 a.m., Blogger Candace said...

's ok, Doug, we are multicultural here and would never, ever comment on someone's less than perfect English as that would be so... unliberal.

At 5:08 p.m., Blogger Timmy the G said...

Hey, buddy, what's up? You've gone totally silent. I hope all is well in the Brooks household. Just busy with work or what?


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